101 ways to Prank, injure andor kill Draco Malfoy
by Hermione'sferret
Summary: with the help of the weasley twins Hermione sets out to prank, Injure and/ or kill Draco Malfoy but some of her plans fail and unexpected feelings are revealed. Set in fifth year.
1. slapped rons and a guilible Draco

Hermione Granger was sitting in the prefects compartment reading a book. Ron had went to find food and she didn't feel like going with him. "Why if it isn't the little mudblood, I never knew you were good enough to be a prefect" Draco Malfoy drawled "shut up Malfoy" Hermione growled "or what mudblood? Going to punch me again?" Draco asked smirking.

SMACK!

Draco rubbed his cheek "That hurt you filthy mudblood" He said glaring at Hermione "it was meant to and you also asked for it" Hermione sneered smirking when he stalked out of the compartment.

From then on Hermione promised herself she would take no more of that ferret's crap and had a plan forming in her mind and needed some help from two particular seventh years.

Hermione knocked on there compartment door. Fred opened it "what is it that Hermione would like?" He asked grinning "I want to injure or prank Draco Malfoy" she said looking at Fred uncertainly was he Fred or George she had known them since her first year and still couldn't tell them apart "Ah welcome dear child to our world" Fred said pulling Hermione into the compartment.

"So why do you want to injure and prank Draco Malfoy" George asked "because the filthy ferret deserves it" Hermione spat. Fred leant over and whispered a plan in George's ear and then produced a list "we made this when we were in third year..." Fred said "and well we are forbidden to use it. Mum found it she destroyed it herself but we had extra copies" George said "We don't fancy a howler. Maybe you could do it for us" Fred said "We will give you any supplies you need" they said at the same time.

Hermione read number 1 on the list 'perfect' she thought.

1. Push him out of the train make sure he lands on his face. Then proceed to walk over him.

Hermione laughed manically thinking about this plan so when the train stopped she Harry and Ron went to find Draco she had told them and they would aid her in her plan. To push him out of the train.

They were getting off the train and Draco was in front of her he span round to talk but before he could speak Ron had shoved into Hermione knocking her into Draco as he fell out he grabbed her robes and pulled her out with him he landed with a thump and she landed on top of him. She quickly jumped off him and dusted off her robes before walking away with a 'hmph' and 'accidentally' kicking him in the face.

"Ron I told you to only shove into me if he had his back turned you idiot" Hermione hissed when they were in a carriage. Ron shrugged and Hermione slapped the back of his head as Harry was silently laughing at them.

2. Put him in a trunk and throw the trunk down a long flight of stairs.

'Mwahahahahaaha' Hermione was thinking of and Drawing her plan and what she was going to do after dinner Professor Mcgonagall looked at her "Miss Granger, you have be disturbing this class for the last 5 minutes will you please stand outside for the remainder of the lesson" Mcgonagall said giving Hermione a stern look. ' Gosh she had been laughing out loud. Wow her mental health would be out window by the time she finished this list' she thought as she walked out of the classroom.

She crept up on him if he would only slow down. She had borrowed harry's invisibility cloak for her plan. "Draco Malfoy" She spoke out in a deep voice "who's there?" Draco asked sounding scared "It is this Bloody Baron" She spoke again in a deep voice rattling chains "you are a slytherin but as you know am I the ghost of slytherin and I want you to prove how slytherin you are" Hermione said grinning under the cloak "how?" Draco asked fearfully "simple in this trunk you will find books" she said pushing a trunk towards Draco "throw them at some hufflepuffs or first years and laugh at them crying" she said opening the trunk "there isn't any books in there" Draco said "look deeper stick your head in" Draco stuck his head inside the large trunk uncertainly. Hermione pushed him in, closed it and locked it Draco banged and rattled the trunk "you failed the test your not slytherin enough here is your punishment" Hermione said dragging the trunk to the top of a long flight of stairs and pushing it down.

He landed at the bottom with a thud and a loud ow Hermione walked off with an evil laugh leaving the trunk there.

Let me know if you like it I just had an idea for something like this I have always imagined that Fred and George would make a list to possibly kill Draco Malfoy. :)


	2. plans gone wrong and pink tutus

3. Make him fall in love with snape.

Hermione silently laughed as she slipped love potion into Draco's goblet she was under Harry's cloak so she would be injured or killed by slytherins.

She watched as Malfoy drank his pumpkin juice and then he stared straight at her. 'Wait didn't the potion work why isn't he running at Snape' She thought not realising he was walking right towards her until he started to snog her...

She pushed him off and wiped her mouth "Malfoy, What the hell?!" Hermione shrieked Draco looked at her with wide eyes "but I love you Hermione!" He protested staring at her a dreamy expression on his face.

Crap! Why did he fall in love with her ohhhh she must have used the wrong potion she banged her book against her head "stupid" she mumbled "is there anything wrong love?" Draco asked a look of concern on his face while Harry and Ron were trying not to laugh Hermione ran out of the hall to find an antidote because the potion wouldn't wear off.

4. Accidentally replace his Nimbus 2001 with one of filch's sweeping brooms.

Since there was a quidditch match tomorrow Slytherin against hufflepuff she decided this was a good time to replace his broom.

"Accio Draco Malfoy's Nimbus 2001!" She smirked as Draco's broom came flying in her window she then proceeded to banish the sweeping broom (which she had charmed to look exactly like a Nimbus 2001) to Draco's room then charmed Draco's broom to look like a sweeping broom and banished it to filch's cupboard.

"It seems like Slytherin seeker Draco Malfoy's broom can't fly. Must be those wood eating worpies eating the magic in his broom" Luna Lovegood said in her dreamy voice. Hermione, Harry and Ron had gone to watch the match and they were trying not to laugh as Draco had a fit down on the pitch trying to get his broom to fly "wingardium leviosa" Hermione whispered pointing her wand at the sweeping broom and waving it as discreetly as possible giggling when Draco's broom suddenly fly upwards then she moved the broom forwards so quickly that Draco fell off "oops" luckily the broom wasn't that high up.

Meanwhile...

Filch was trying to sweep the floor with his favourite broom when it kept flying up and down so he abandoned the broom after twenty minutes of struggling with it.

5. In the middle of a crowded hall way point a fake wand at him a yell the killing curse.

"Malfoy!" Hermione yelled coming out of tranfiguration and seeing the hallway crowded Draco turned round Hermione pointed her wand at him "um hi Hermione" He said eyeing her wand nervously "AVADA KERDAVERA!" Hermione Shrieked Draco screamed and everyone gasped but then laughed when they realised that it was a fake wand Draco glared at her "WHAT WAS THAT FOR GRANGER?!" He yelled 'no more love potion' was what Hermione was thinking "what did you wet your pants malfoy?" She sneered and began to walk away only to be pulled back "Malfoy let me go" She said pulling away again only to realise that she and Draco were connected by a chain.

She shook her wrist "Malfoy, what did you do!?" She yelled as she pulled him to Dumbledore's office "I didn't do anything Granger I think it came out of the wand you were trying to kill me with" Malfoy said smirking.

They were standing outside Dumbledore's office and Hermione had been guessing for 10 minutes "umm acid pops" Hermioe suggested "lemon drop" she tried again "fainting fancy" Draco suggested and the Gargoyle moved "you knew it the whole time?!" Hermione shrieked rounding on him "Um no I just guessed" Draco said gulping and going up the staircase.

"Professor, we can't stay like this are you sure you don't know a way to get it off now" Hermione moaned they were seated in Dumbledore's office "Yea I can't be stuck with her" Draco added yelping when Hermione hit him "no I am very sorry miss Granger and mr Malfoy you will have to wait" Professor Dumbledore said showing them out of the office.

his hair pink.

Hermione muttered the spell to colour Draco's hair pink it was hard to remove and not even the seventh years had learnt it she also added a tutu.

She giggled "Malfoy... Why is your hair pink?" She asked giggling madly "wha omph!" He never finished his sentence because he fell down a flight of stairs dragging Hermione with him.


	3. Pansy Parkinson and punched Malfoys

Sorry it took a little longer than I thought it would I lost the chapter so I had to rewrite it then I got a lot of snow and I haven't had internet connection. But anyway enjoy the chapter! :)

HGDMHGDMHGDM

Hermione giggled and sat up "thank you for being a cushion Malfoy" she said smirking getting up only to be pulled back down hitting her head off the floor "ow stupid chain" she groaned rubbing her head.

She got up and attempted to drag a Groaning Draco to the hospital wing "Really Malfoý it isn't that bad" She said flopping down on the floor "owwww it hurts owwwwwww I can't move" Draco groaned sarcastically

7. Tell Pansy Parkinson that her Drakie poo misses her.

"Oi, Parkinson" Hermione yelled to Pansy "What do you want mudblood?" Pansy sneered

"Your Drakie Poo misses you" Hermione said smirking as she was pointing to a groaning Draco.

"Aww poor Drakie what did you do to him you filthy little mudblood" Pansy said running at Draco who looked up in alarm and started running away from her. Once he had dragged Hermione inside the hospital wing he slammed the door and locked it before collapsing on the ground.

Hermione looked through her library book whilst Draco's injuries were being treated "please keep still Mr Malfoy" "OW THAT HURTS!" 'hmm interesting the potions effects disappear if hate breaks through the barrier of love'. "Mr Malfoy don't make me use my wand" "..." Hermione chuckled Draco never did like the school nurse.

8. Introduce him to the giant spiders

Hermione was dragging Draco through the forest "Granger this isn't safe let's turn back" Draco said eyes wide with fear as he tugged the chain.

"AHHHHHHHH" Draco let out girlish scream as he spotted Grawp and started running further into the forest dragging Hermione with him "HELP HELP GIANT HELP!" He screamed as Hermione tried to shut him up but he continued running.

10 MINUTES LATER...

She pulled back the chain and he fell and landed on the floor with a thump Hermione sat on his back and clamped his mouth shut "Malfoy, do you want to attract dangerous creatures?" Hermione asked calmly he shook his head vigorously.

Hermione got up and started walking then realised something she slapped Draco on the back of the head "Draco, you prat you turned so many times I don't know which direction is the way out" she said looking distressed Draco smirked "you called me Draco" he said his smirk growing wider "hmm must mean you like me Granger" he teased smirking as he watched her face go red in anger "awwww Granger is blushing!"

SMACK!

"Ow now that was uncalled for" he said rubbing his cheek "Then keep your fat mouth shut!" She yelled Draco glared at her.

They wandered around for a while when Hermione remembered her wand "of course I have my wand, Point me!" she said triumphantly.

Her wand pointed in the direction of Hogwarts she tugged on the chain not looking behind her "Come on Malfoy let's go" she said impatiently she heard a whimper she started to turn round "Malfoy what in godric's... AHHHHH!"...


End file.
